Marriage

after reading a book and finishing it for the first time has opened doors to me and as I went to shower after yelling at everybody for eating my diet dinner which I ended up not eating anything and hoping they would feel bad about what they done but minutes later I hear my sister shouting "dinner!!" so now I'm sure no one cared about me or my diet dinner .

ps: I'll be using the word "I" in this –Whatever you call it - since it's my point of view.

As a girl I've been always thinking about how beautiful marriage is , Marrying the one I've loved then having a nice job , a car , home and a little baby I'm guessing this is most of girls fantasy . and I grew up and the word "Marriage" has disappeared from my head by getting involved with life and how it is , and here I am after all the ups and downs in my life , after knowing my goal and going forward to it while keeping in mind the past mistakes so I wont fall on them again . All what can I think about is my final semester and closing my last chapter in the college I'm thinking about my project and how high my believes in it , I've been hearing that a guy has came to ask for my hand who? I didn't know but I didn't care much about it cuz I know now that "love" is a word that comes in movies , but you can love your parents , sisters and friends but a guy ?? that's the biggest mistake you'll ever fall in . you can't have a relationship with a guy it's wrong and you'll be hated if you did that . anyways back to me in my sister engagement which she had also chosen a man she doesn't know very much but she had worked with him for some time so she was confident enough to say yes to him , I have been told who is he since I started to feel weird when his mother hugged me and said " hopefully we will be happy for you soon" . my mother has told me that they went to ask for another girl hand but when they saw the guy who asked for my sister hand got accepted they felt that it's better to come to my family and ask for my hand instead of a strangers daughter . and sometimes I feel sorry for them since my grandfather has abandon them from marring any of his 10 daughter they have lost hope and when my father broke that law he opened this door for them .

If you'r asking about my opinion to this ... I don't know anymore , my mother and father are happy about him , my aunts"the 10 daughters" demanding to reject him , my sister has said her famous word since she flew very far away to study " If you said yes to them I'm not your sister " my friends has told me that I shouldn't take him because he's from the family . and me my mind is saying no but my heart stays silent because I don't want to hear to my heart , I don't know the guy but I have seen him few time nearly to imposable , I don't know his thoughts , his likings or the way he lives and if I wanted to know it'll be to late to turn my back and say NO , sometimes I wonder if I will really meet the one or will I be just like the rest of the girls and blend in and live with someone who doesn't care if I have feelings for him or no .